Saying These 2 Words Could Fix Your Anxiety!

How to ACTUALLY act on what you know you should do

1. Change happens when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of making a change.
2. What if? Is that what if you can be xxx?

It breaks my heart how stuck people are

1. There are things you can do to improve your life, and if you don’t have hope, you’ll be stuck in resignation.
2. If you’re unaware you’re stuck in something, there’s no way you can change it.

Why you need to WANT change to actually change

1. Start acting like the person who has the thing you want right now even if you don’t feel like it.

Why motivation is garbage

1. Motivation is garbage because it’s not there when you need it.
2. The biology of how most human beings work is that when encountering things the process of feelings is sensation → perception → feeling → thought → action.
   1. Look at your behavior and understand the chain ( **sensation → perception → feeling → thought → action **), and reverse it.
   2. If you don’t reverse it, then it would precede what action you take → you’re not in control of what you doing.
   3. Two ways to around it:
      1. Work with a licensed therapist who can help you do the deeper work of understanding yourself and your default thinking patterns.<br>Then do the work to challenge those assumptions and change the way you think.

Why people don’t change even when they say they want to?

1. It’s important to understand that you may never like the things you need to do, but you can still do them.

The fastest way to take control of your life

1. Let them theory:
   1. The fastest way to take control of your life is to stop controlling everyone around you.
   2. You have no idea how much time, energy, and attention you are wasting trying to control other people.
   3. You have zero control over others.
2. There is so much controlling that we do in the lives of other people, and it ruins our relationships.
3. When you say LET THEM, you acknowledge what’s happening and what bothers you.

The best advice I ever received

1. The worst advice Mel has ever received: Someone else can make you happy.
2. If you pull all the energy that is used to control others back and be conservative for yourself, then you will have the energy to take the steps and change the way that you think.<br>Eventually, you will have what you want on your left.

Setting goals that align with you

1. It’s very important to assess where you are before you jump into what’s next.
   1. e.g. it’s impossible to set a direction before you know your starting point and where you want to go.
2. You know where you starting from, and you ask yourself what your goal looks like, and how can you from where you’re to the goal you want.
3. Figure out who am I jealous of, it’s usually much faster than who am I inspired by.
4. You can’t feel jealous of somebody unless you authentically want something for real that you think they have.
   1. The jealousy happens because you have somewhere in your psyche told yourself you can’t have it → That’s why it’s negative.

Why you need to stop letting people’s reactions affect you

1. fear is something that runs peoples’ lives, it makes you avoid, shrink, live in silence, and deny what you’re feeling, and too often the fear that we fear the most is what others will say and their reactions.